When a storm is coming, all other birds seek shelter. The eagle alone avoids the storm by flying above it. So, in the storms of life may your heart be like an eagle’s and soar above.” – Author Unknown


Encouragement to get real therapy on near a river.

Please read this if you or someone you care about practices this dangerous type of therapy.

Yesterday I was out shopping with some friends, buying something I really need.  The woman in front of me in line made an interesting comment to the saleswoman.  She said, “I really do not need these shoes but I just want them.  Now I can shop for new clothes to match them!”  This woman was clearly practicing retail therapy.  She was shopping to make herself happy, something that 49% of Americans do.

Why do forty-nine percent of Americans do this?

One of the most common triggers for retail therapy is old trauma.  When things happened years ago or even in childhood and a person has not processed those events, they may respond with emotional shopping or retail therapy.

The second trigger for this unnecessary behavior is keeping up with your friends. People who practice retail therapy to keep up with their friends are insecure.  They fear that if they do not keep up with their friends, their friends will not like them anymore.

Overspending due to trauma or insecurity results in the same thing:  depleting your savings account and stressing your family.  Your family members may not tell you they feel stressed out because of your spending but they usually are.

If you buy clothes you never wear or others things you do not need, perhaps you should ask yourself three questions:  Do I need things I buy?  Will I ever use the things I buy?  Does my mate believe we can afford the things I buy?

If the answer to these questions is no, perhaps you should consider finding a therapist who specializes in money issues.  These therapists know that underlying issues cause a person to shop emotionally and that over spenders need to deal with their underlying issues.

Do you overspend and fear the cost of counseling?  If so, realize that counseling is much less expensive than the cost or your overspending habit.

The woman in front of me in line yesterday reminds me of a friend I have known for 30 years.  She constantly overspends due to childhood trauma and her family is very stressed out.  Although her husband does not like to argue and therefore does not face the issue with her, her overspending could cost them their financial security and their marriage.

If this post applies to you, there is no reason to feel ashamed.  I hope you get the help you need instead of continuing to overspend and stress your family.  Please get real therapy to cope instead of practicing retail therapy.

Remember that there is no shame in getting help for a problem, but there is shame in hurting your family.

Soar like an eagle over life’s storms.  Get help for retail your retail therapy before it destroys your family!

You might also enjoy the encouraging words in these Near a River posts:

What will you do on the first day of the rest of your life?

Is it possible to please everyone you know?

Yes, you can do miracles!

If we meet…

If you enjoyed this post, remember that BJ writes children’s books. Her children’s eagle Near a River common core reading book is available on Amazon.com and Barnesandnoble.com. Buy BJ’s  Near a River eagle reading book for a child you care about today!


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"Each reader's heart is like an eagle's and can soar above the storms in life..." - Near a River's Author, BJ Rae.

Written with uplifting words of encouragement, Near a River is a photographic children's book about two young bald eagles who are eager for their mother to teach them to fly so they may soar over the storms in their lives. Near a River encourages early childhood reading. BJ hopes that every child becomes a strong reader and soars above the storms in life.

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